I came here not knowing what I would be doing, though I had high hopes of being the traditional missionary. I was going to paint murals in underprivileged neighbourhoods, volunteer at a refugee school with traumatized children, bring bags of food to poor families struggling to survive in the community, do Bible studies with university students who were searching for meaning, and learn Arabic so I could communicate easily and build relationships with the pharmacist and cashier and hairstylist. Alas, I failed terribly.
I've been here 2 years and I still haven't visited the refugee school. My language skills are poor and I haven't connected with any of those I had planned to. I've not accomplished enough to be considered a true missionary. Instead, I feel like I've taken more than I've given, as my community has poured time, food, and love into my life. I've tried to repay it in kind but never can keep up.
This morning in staff worship, the assistant chaplain asked us, What does it mean to store up treasure in heaven? He'd been pondering the verse and I'll admit that, while I previously wrote a beautiful blog that seemed to wrap up the concept neatly with a bow on top, I didn't quickly share it with the group. I realized that my previous analogy was rather paltry when considering the verse once more. That's the beauty of the Bible--that its depth never ceases to astound.
The rich young man came to Jesus asking what he was to do. Jesus replied with the commandments relating to others and the young man earnestly answered that he was doing all those things. Then, Jesus said, sell everything and follow Me. This was where the young man's heart could go no further. He had dedicated himself to doing. He had spent his life being faithful to what was tangible, what could be seen. Now he was being asked to be. This was a concept so foreign to him that he could not accept it. He gave up on fulfillment and a lifetime of meaning because he was unable to be a follower of Jesus.
The treasure wasn't measured by wealth, neither was it defined by a rigorous list of commands. True treasure, stored up in heaven, was only accessible through a genuine commitment to the One Who understood what treasure represented. To treasure something is to put that object above all other objects. To treasure someone is to see that person as the most important person in your life. You will set aside anything or anyone else that gets between you and your treasure.
When Jesus asked the young man to follow Him, He was asking the young man to change his framework of reference from one that perceived treasure in heaven as being accepted for achieving perfectly the written law but to see the treasure as a relationship with the One Who wrote the law and represented the law. Yet even more than the law, Jesus represented mercy and grace. If the young man had understood this, he would have joyfully followed Jesus.
Perhaps this is what Jesus is asking me to do in my life. I believe it is important that we meet the needs of others to the best of our ability. However, I am learning that a relationship with Jesus must supercede all others, though not to the exclusion of others. Perhaps God did not call me here to be a traditional missionary. My calling may be to the long-term. To settling in to the fabric of life so closely that I become one of the many threads of colour in the patchwork quilt of my community. To be faithful in the small things because that is where servanthood really comes to life.
I'm learning in my relationships with others that they do not expect me to do as much as be. Though I've spent most of my life looking for ways to help others, my true friends do not base our friendship on what I can do for them. They simply enjoy who I am as I enjoy who they are in return. Time deepens this connection and I'm grateful for the ones who continue to show me that I have value because I am a part of their lives.
Perhaps a true missionary is not fulfilling the expected traditional roles. Perhaps it is being and in the being finding fulfillment in Him.
No comments:
Post a Comment